The war to our east, real and projection
Threatens my flesh; pleads self-reflection
While my inner war: love battling fear,
Decides my quality, of life living here
Since fear triggers all wars, outside and in
Of course, my unhinged world, reflects me within
As my war with my fear, amps my self-doubt
Uneasy inside me, seeks easy way out
Aiming external, rescues insecurity
Blaming your flaws…so reassuring
Projecting on you frees my anxieties
You’re now default, for my improprieties
But, making you less, pretending superior
I still can’t flee dread, feeling inferior
Yet afraid I’m a loser, stuck in self-rancor,
My fear teams aggression, upgrading to anger
Overriding impotence… posturing arrogance,
I enlist my anguish, to soldier malevolence
My war now: crush loving and dangers of intimacy
Before I‘m found fraud, when I know you’ll desert me
So, I harness desperation, invading your space,
No way you can leave me, with me in your face
Though I know bullying you, from fake pleasured power
Never wins the war against believed inner coward
…………………………………………………………………….
Our war rose innocent, noting our differences
Then, afraid to differ, we magnified dissonance
Not melding contrasts to make our love stronger,
We weakened us waging who’s right or who’s wronger
Judgements built distance, trenched separation,
As I boosted combat, for self-reputation
Till it’s all about winning, now…saving my ego
There’s no more of us…or future, where we go
We fear-killed our union; fear wins such wars
Stockpiling antipathy, guaranteeing divorce
Once partnered, now foes…doomed to hostility,
Extinguishing our humanity, for soulless nihility
……………………………………………………………………..
How did we get here? Just follow my fear
I let (my) insecurities make love disappear
Now I’m left cursing, true essence profaned,
Stunned how my war, sponsors Russia-Ukraine